I was searching for some information in internet when I came upon an inquiry regarding meditation course that caught my attention. I thought quite pitiful of the person because his very inquiry itself carried impossibility to find any answer or relief to help him in anyways. At first I thought of writing him but I decided not to. But it was a good case study to reflect. The inquiry went something like this;
“…is there any meditation class in KL? I am keen on attending one. I don’t believe in the charging ones. Anyone knows about it? I really need to learn meditation because this stress and tension is driving me crazy…”
What do you think? Can you see the problems with this inquiry? Can you see him having fundamental problem in his attitude, in his belief system that is the source of his stress, tension and misery, even poverty?
Obviously he is looking for free meditation courses, because he doesn’t have money or doesn’t want to pay for what he needs. Either way, the problem is not the money, but is his attitude of ‘wanting something for nothing.’ Not only that, he is accusing others who charge the fees by making the strong statement of not believing in them, ‘demanding before deserve.’ Who would want to teach him meditation? Not me. I would love to teach meditation free to those deserving, grateful ones; but not his kinds. In fact I would run far, far away even if he consents to pay the fees. Doing so will be like instructing a monkey to take care of a diamond.
I know where he got this idea. Traditionally, be in India or China, meditation is taught free by Gurus or monks. But don’t forget, who is supporting them, we, laymen. That is why they give teaching free in return because that is their Dharma. Does he sound like attached to any temple giving any financial supports to them? I don’t think so, or else he won’t place his inquiry to the web instead of asking to his temple. And also, we are living in the modern world, not some remote ancient village, in where the community lifestyle supports all the members in it.
In our modern living, in where we don’t even know who our neighbors are, we support each other through the fair transaction of service and money. We exchange values based upon what we want and the price we pay for it. He conveniently pastes his belief system with the mixed-up ideas to justify his unwillingness to pay. Does he have the right attitude to learn the right meditation from the right teachers? Even if he learns, he won’t’ be practice it in the right way because his value system is based on money. What he didn’t pay for, he is not going to take it seriously. He will also remain poor. Why?
In life, we reap what we sow. We attract what we are. If we project stinginess, we receive scarcity. If we project generosity, we receive fortune and abundance. It’s not his lack of money but his attitude, his ingratitude that is the very source of his poverty, stress and tension. Instead of being honest in his inability to pay the fees but to accuse others for their right to charge fees for their service, you can just see how dishonest and stingy he is. When he is not willing to support others’ lives, how, then, can he attract goodness, fortune to his own life, no matter how hard he try? This one way of thinking, seeing things in terms of what he wants only is the very source of his unhappiness, stress, tension and poverty.
You see, it all comes down to one’s attitude and behavior for whatever we have in life. If you give big, you will also receive big; if you give small or nothing at all, then you get the same as well. It’s the principle of reciprocal or karmic law. If you give love, caring, respect, consideration, then, you will receive that as well. If you haven’t given any of these, but wondering why you are not happy, alone, and poor, you better check the color of your heart whether it’s not black. Only thieve has a black heart that is tightly clogged. Our life expands based on what we have sown. If you planted nothing at all during summer time but expect harvest during autumn; isn’t that absurd just to hear? Funny thing is we often laugh at other’s folly but blind to our own absurdity.
Thereby, let’s ask, before we demand; what have we contributed to others, why we believe we deserve better life. Are you happy, are you satisfied with your life right now? If the quality of your life, your health, and your relationships are less than what you desire, then, we have ask ourselves about what we have done, what we have given, to have it better, to enjoy better health, relationships and success alike. I often marvel at someone who constantly complains about others or circumstances for faults, problems, unhappiness and lacks in their life. It is like waiting for whatever they want to drop from the sky. Typically, they are very selfish, ego-centric with the mind as narrow as needle that pokes at your patience and disenchantment. You want to stay away from those people as far as you can. They will rob you of happiness and taint your heart with their questionable characters.
On the other hand, when you see someone who is always out to give, you can tell they generally live a good life; they are easy to please, simple minded, grateful and also hard working. They attract goodness, righteousness and happiness in life by giving out just that to others. It is so nice to be around them because they are like angels without wings. They have infectious laughter and sparkling eyes lightening your heart anytime, any day.
A good yard stick, in inviting happiness, beauty and good fortune to our life, there fore, is examining ourselves, whether we are a giver or a taker. Are you a giver or a taker? Do you like free gifts, free meals, while you are stingy in your purse string? Are you the one to always give first in your relationships, in your dealings and in your work? Or do you wait until the others to give their love, understanding and acceptance so that you can give it back or not give it at all as you think you deserve? The goddess of good fortune is going to elude us as long as we stay on the taker’s side. You can also evaluate others that are close to you; family members, friends, colleagues, etc, in where they stand. If you are surrounded with more of givers, then, your life will be joyful and happy one. If not, you will be suffering from one heartache after another, filled with struggles, conflicts, stress, tension, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. As much as it is important to guard our heart to stay open and be generous, be careful of whom you associate with as well. The takers don’t like to get drawn in the pool of life’s misery alone but will pull your legs to die together…
